So I thought I'd update about the relationship (or lack thereof) between my mother and Facade, since me and her just got off the phone and talked about it. She seems pretty definite that they could never be together now. In some ways I am afraid to believe this, but here is why I believe it anyway: the reason they stopped seeing each other the first time was because he hurt her very badly, and she still had feelings for him that went unresolved. This time, they stopped dating because he's a controling idiot who has absolutely no capacity for introspection whatsoever, and thinks that everyone else is the problem, that it couldn't possibly him. she's stopped seeing him because she's disgusted with him, instead of being disgusted with him because they've stopped seeing each other, like last time. He's still pissed off because my mom let my sister jump off that pier in lake tahoe, and even admitted to the shrink that there was no reason for her not to other than that he didn't think she should, and the shrink basically told him that that wasn't really a reason. Every time the shrink tries to get him to identify his feelings, facade shrivels up like an old grape and completely fails to notice anything. The only reason he persists in going to the shrink with my mother is because he's still trying to get her to be with him, and because he thinks the problems are all with my mother, me, and my sister and that the shrink will "fix" us so that we fit into his fantasy world. I almost feel sorry for the man, what with him being so delusional and all. He's just completely oblivious to everyone and everything, including his own feelings, which is really very sad. The other reason that I know they'll never successfully be together is that he is very controlling, and my mother will always rebel against that, and rightfully so. He's still of the archaic thinking that men should be in charge of the relationship, and in charge of the decisions regarding the children, and my mom is very stubborn, and very independant, and will always resent that sort of presumptuousness. So that, hopefully, is the end of this silly maddness. Hopefully she'll find someone better suited for her, but only when she's ready to reexamine what she's looking for and why. If everything else is hopeless with them going to therapy, it at least seems like the shrink is helping her to see the causes of her decisions and reactions to things. Bravo to him for that. Well, I really should be studying now... Though I'll probably be posting quite frequently for at least the next few days... I need something to procrastinate with. :)