stacy was here (and probably spinning....): advice















Stacy Was Here :
Back at the Beginning

Friday, March 20, 2009


In my experience, there are certain times or events in your life that cause the people around you to feel they have the right to give you unsolicited advice.  I knew that happens at graduations, during pregnancies, and even when you get married.  I guess I should have seen it coming, but apparently divorce is one of those times, and I've been getting everything from gently stated, well-meaning advice to out and out rude assertions that, obviously, I have no idea what life is all about and, obviously, everyone else knows better what I should be doing with myself.  That, and there are old friends of mine who seem to have forgotten that I exist... even ones who were my friends before I ever met him.  I guess it's true what they say, difficult times have a way of showing you who your real friends are.

So, to whoever happens to be reading this, here is my new rule:  I am not accepting any more advice from people unless they have a) been married and divorced themselves, and b) have more general life experience than I do.  Pay close attention to B, because I may be 29, but I probably have the life experience of someone quite a bit older than that.  I guess I should also add C) must be someone I respect.  Otherwise, stuff it and just be supportive.  Besides, everyone has split into waring factions, from "he's a vile scumbag" to "you obviously didn't try hard enough", from "move on with your life and go have a fling" to "you should be sitting in your room, crying, with a black shroud over your head for at least a year before you even think of liking someone else."  So whose crappy advice would I even choose?

On the flip side, of course, is that the two pieces of advice that I have received from people who fit those criteria are my knew guiding themes in life;  the first was "don't ever look back", and the second was "take this opportunity to reflect and decide what it is that you really want and need out of a relationship".

So that's what I'm doing right now, trying to define what I want and need, not just out of a relationship, but out of life, too.  I know for sure that whoever I end up in a relationship with needs to be able to appreciate everything I am, not just part of it.  I like to go camping and hike and get dirty, but I also like museums and theatre and getting a bit fancy from time to time.  I like to be looked after, but I can change my own tires and operate heavy machinery on my own, so I don't want to be patronized, either.  I want someone I can have great conversations with - especially someone who has their own opinions, no matter whether they're the same opinions as mine.  I want someone who will see the world with me, but will also be comfortable curling up on the couch and watching a movie sometimes.  Most of all, I want someone who will open up to me, and will let me know whats going on with them, honestly.  

On to knitting, (because it always comes back to fiber with me, lol), I started a sweater last night,  this one, and I'm already at least a third of the way through it.  I love this pattern because it has so many little ways to customize it and make it your own.  I'm knitting it with a delicious angora blend from Elsebeth Lavold.  It's been discontinued, though, and I can't for the life of me imagine why.  It's so soft I just want to sit here petting it for days, and it's knitting up beautifully.  Why would they want to disccontinue something so lovely?  How is it that the pernicious Fun Fur seems to survive year after year, but this lovely find is going extinct? 

Here is Franny darling modeling with the yarn.  She's great about not messing with my yarn or knitting implements, but I still miss Zelda, knitting scourge though she was.

I got the yarn at Tuesday Morning, but of course they don't have a very big yarn selection, so there wasn't enough of just the grey to do much with, so I picked up the lone skein of purple and am adding purple stripes to the sweater.  Normally I'm not big into stripes, but I'm starting to kind of like the way its turning out.

And here's my progress so far.  I can't believe how fast this sweater is knitting up, that represents maybe 2 hours worth of work last night... the size 11 needles help, but at this rate it's going to become my potato chip pattern (i.e., you can't make just one.)  Fortunately, there are enough options for changing the sweater along the way, so at least they'll all look different, lol.

Labels: , , , ,

posted by Cat Named Eggroll @ 2:29 PM   1 comments


At 9:30 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Interesting transition from advice to knitting.


Post a Comment

<< Home