stacy was here (and probably spinning....): 08/01/2001 - 09/01/2001















Stacy Was Here :
Back at the Beginning

Friday, August 31, 2001

Well, this week has been stressful, but I'm now more or less settled in at school. With the help of two of my more dedicated friends I rolled the heavier boxes up to my third floor lodgings. They're round now, but at least they're up in my room.

Despite what I thought before, having a roommate is not the hellish experience I thought it was going to be, nothing like last time. My roomie, whom for purposes of anonymity I will call Patty O'Green, is very laid back, and we seem to have enough in common to get along well, and not enough in common to eventually detest each other. This could work. I am still on the singles list, however, and would still love it if they would give me a single in my old dorm from last year. It's closer to everything. This one is more remote, and it's an old mansion, so it's corners are full of malevolent heebie-jeebies. Consequently I've been spending a lot of time in the computer lab, for 3 reasons: 1, it's air conditioned, unlike the rest of the house, 2, I haven't gotten my computer shipped just yet, so it's this or nothing, and 3, the room is well lit, sometimes populated, and all together less creepy than my room.

I've come to the conclusion that taking things for granted is an unavoidable side effect of the human condition. I think my crowning achievement of the summer was spending lots of time with my little sister. We did so much together, but I still feel like we could have done more. The same goes for things with my friends and with my mom. I could have seen a lot more of Silver if I hadn't have been so worried about the state of my gas tank. I could have seen more of SwhS if I had been in a better mood. I could have seen more of my mother if I hadn't let my feelings slip out from under me in my all-too-characteristic fashion. Now that I'm back at school, I can see where I let a lot of opportunities pass by. Every day it gets a little easier to be here, though. More than anything, though, I miss my mom and sister. I love my friends to death, but I could live without even them if I had my family here. Fortunately my uncle gave me a calling card so I can call home much more frequently than last year.

I can't wait for the end of the year. I get to spend two weeks at home with the family, and two weeks in LONDON!!! I love London. I went there in high school and, pitiful company aside, I fell in love with the city. The average person in London is so much better educated than the average person in the US, and if you look at our leadership here, it's pretty obvious why. I got my book for the precourse for the trip, and it's all about architecture in England, and in flipping through it I'm reminded why I fell in love with London. The tendrils of british history wind themselves so much deeper into the folds of time. Everywhere you go, there are reminders of the road that humanity has travelled to reach it's current state. The castles, aside from being lovely and full of images that conjur fanciful musings, remind us of a time when people were seperated by class far more than they are now. The huge cathedrals remind us of a time when the church had the power of life and death over large masses of the population. While not everyone notices these things, it's kind of nice to be in a place where the growth and evolution of human thinking is so evident.

That said, I'm starting to get very bored with my website. There is so much I don't know about web development and publishing. Maybe I'll take a class on it next semester? Suggestions would be welcome. Adding more pictures can only excite me for so long.

posted by Cat Named Eggroll @ 8:10 PM   0 comments

Saturday, August 25, 2001

Provided I don't get interrupted (ha ha ha), this will be a great and powerful blog to wrap up my relatively blog-free summer. This week has been mighty interesting, and definitely the sort to keep me on my toes.

Tahoe wasn't so bad. True, Facade was in top form, but even he couldn't ruin it. Tahoe is a huge, majestic mountain forrest, and those kinds of places always do it for me. We went to Vikingsholm, the Ehrman Mansion, and Virginia City (where Samual Clemmens first wrote as Mark Twain.) All in all the trip was pretty cool. And I am quite proud of myself for keeping my cool around Facade, which was no easy task, I assure you.

Let me first say that I don't feel bad for the bashing I'm about to give him online in my own journal. For my mothers sake, I managed to not blow up at him, and managed not to whack him upon is bulbous, balding head. I have finally found out what his talent is (because everyone has a talent.) He is able, without fail, to do and say exactly the wrong thing at exactly the wrong time. He managed to insult my mothers driving 12 hours into our hellish drive home (more on that later,) and to be a complete prick for just about all of the rest of the drive. He tried to scare my sister out of an experience that she will now never forget (more on that later,) and he managed to interrupt every damn night of sleep with his freakish snoring. The man is completely inept at camping, driving, and damn near everything else as far as I can tell. He was even irritating my mother, who is more patient than me. He spent most of our "vacation" on some stupid, obsessive quest to retrieve two hundred dollars from a park ranger who turned out not to be the same person he lent it to ten years ago. I'd say his biggest fault is that he is too trusting of some people, and too paranoid of others. And then there's his complete inability to let anything go and just relax. He doesn't have that in him. My mother made me promise to remind her of this trip if she ever wants to take him camping again.

Which brings me to my mother. My mom is one of the coolest people I know, and even though we don't always see eye to eye on things, she's really an amazing lady. If she errs in giving her time to Facade, then she errs only in the desire and eagerness to be happy. And if she errs in spending time with him, then that is for her to decide, and not me. Even though I detest every fiber of his being, and don't trust him as far as I can spit, it is still her decision to make, and I can't begrudge her that. My only hope is that one of these days she'll realize that she deserves better.

The drive back home was hellish. What should have taken 8 hours ended up taking 16. The van was burning oil, so that every hour or so we had to dump in a couple more quarts. We did stop a couple of times, but most of that time was spent driving. For the first time in my life, I can honestly say that I am ready to go 4 months without a car. It was hell. We left at 11 in the morning, and got home at 5 am the next day. Most of the time the car was filled with the noxious odor of burning oil so that I almost got really, violently ill. We finally got home, where I slept for 4 hours, and am now up again to get ready to leave for Pittsburgh tonight. Hopefully this journey will be a little smoother.

And now for something completely different. I have a crush on someone. Yes, it's silly, and yes, I probably am a little old for this. Having feelings for someone is really a remarkable thing, and the fledgling stages of it are just completely fun for me. The world changes ever so slightly. Those stupid, cheesy love songs cease to be trite for a while and in the hazy bliss seem to be shiny pearls of joy from the heavens meant especially for you. I am the worst of all when it comes to crushes, because I completely indulge myself in the giddiness of it. Who cares about being careful, and who cares if nothing at all ever comes of it. That's not what's important. Sometimes you need these silly little infatuations to remind you that you are capable of loving another person, even if the infatuations are not love. In all reality I'm sure it's not. But I tend to think of it as practice for that time when the situation will prove me wrong.

And now, to my friends.

To Sky Wanderer. This summer I've discovered that you are as flawed as anyone, and you know what? I appreciate you all the more for it. It's nice to know that even you are as human as I am, and prone to little eccentricities just like everyone else.

To the Crown. It's really sad that our society is so quick to misunderstand innocence and naivette as something wrong. Even though you are the Queen Bitch, you also have a heart of gold, and I hope it helps a little to know that I have the utmost faith in your good intentions.

To Sings with her Spirit. If I had a bag of extra summers, I'd call a big do-over and put myself in better spirits and be a better friend for you. Even though I've been distant, you are still one of my best friends, and always will be.

To OTB. Yes, I'm an old stick in the mud. And yes, we usually do rub each other the wrong way. But you know what? Sometimes it's really nice to be around someone as silly as you. Be careful with your heart, and be careful what promises and committments you make, written, expressed, or otherwise.

To Hector (otherwise known as OTB's big brother). One of these days I'm going to make you get my number tattooed on your arm so you can't lose it ;) Yes, I'm arrogant, thanks for pointing it out. And yes, I am a very loud supporter of my own opinions. Birds of a feather flock together, eh?

To everyone: love each other, and recognize the fragility of every soul around you, and we may just get through this strange life.

To everyone in Pittsburgh: Look out, here I come!

posted by Cat Named Eggroll @ 11:12 AM   0 comments

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