Never thought I'd write those words, but damn, you gotta give the guy credit, he seems like a truly decent human being:



Looks like I might just be able to forgive Chuck Norris after all...

I wrote a long blog entry with my reaction to the ideas Barak Obama brought up in his speech on racism today. I'm not posting it, at least not yet, because even writing it makes me feel woefully ignorant and inadequate to address such a weighty subject upon which I have so little credible experience.

What I will say, however, is that we have the opportunity to elect someone to the presidency who could potentially have an historical impact beyond what we've seen in our lifetimes. And not just because he would be president, but because he is inspiring, because he gives hope to people and reminds us that we have a responsibility to society and ourselves to be better people, and to leave the world a little better than when we got here. Bush will be relegated to the history as the most incompetant, least intelligent president in US history. We already passed up the opportunity to elect a Nobel Prize winner.

We are *lucky* to have the opportunity to vote for someone of his calibre. He would make a wonderful president, if only we are smart enough to elect him.

* We had to take Joey back to the shelter. He's an amazing dog, house trained in three days, very smart and loving, but he is a high energy dog and I am not a high energy person. He was bored, even though we got him as much activity as we could, and I just know this isn't a good home for him. He need a herd of sheep or lots of kids to play with, a nice yard or something. He needs more than we can currently give him, so we made the gut-wrenching decision to take him back and give him the chance to find a more suitble home. I made sure the sheler people understood that he didn't do anything wrong, that it's my fault, my limitations. I still feel like the most horrible person on the face of the earth, though.

* Finally saw a dr about my foot problems (the ones beyond the ingrown toenail stuff.) She gave me antibiotics to kill the infection in the toes, and already they feel tons better, they're not burning as much, and I'm just not having as much nerve pain as I have been. Could it really be this simple? I'm getting them xrayed later, so we'll see what kind of damage I've done that way by walking abnormally for almost a decade. I'm cautiously optimistic at this point, whereas I've been paranoid for months and months about this. Wish me luck.

I think we adopted the gasiest dog on the planet. Dear lord.

* hit rock bottom, including thinking a lot about killing myself (abstractly, like it would be easier, blah blah blah... not shopping for a method, and don't worry, it's passed.)
* came up with the hair brained idea that getting a service dog would help me emotionally, went on ensuing emotional rollercoaster where Fuzzy said no, then realized what a basket case I was becoming, started to consider it, asked his boss, I fell in love with a pit named Tatum, Fuzzy's boss said no pit, spiraled into despondency, found border collie lab mix I love, boss said yes, adopted said border collie (Joey), found out Tatum got her forever home same day.
* was a big dumbass and forgot to refil paxil subscription. been off paxil 3 full days now, no panic attacks, attribute this to Joey since was doing bad on paxil before, and now I'm in withdrawl and no problems.
* been run ragged by Joey. am tired, but am sleeping much better, even without ambien. starting to feel like I might actually get through this.